Original Photo by Gerard

Original Photo by Gerard

G-d came to me many years ago, and then again a few years ago, and then again. He didn’t come because I was good or because I was beautiful or because I was a delight to be with.

He didn’t come because he had heard of the latest book I had written or the awesome idea I had, or because of my articulate speech.

He came for none of those reasons. He didn’t come because I was good or great or worthy of his company.

It was the opposite really. I was crushed. I was broken. I didn’t know which way was up. I was confused and unsure of anything and my plans were in shambles. The ground was still shaking underneath my feet when he showed up.

When my mess was just about to take me under, he came.

My heart had lost hope. Disappointment had begun to take hold. I was just barely hanging on.

In this state, with sadness consuming my being, I looked up.

Help, G-d, please help. If there’s anything left for me, please help.

He came. He found me. He showed up.

When you wonder if he forgot your name
or if he sees you at all anymore

If you think there’s no way out of your situation.
or you’ve lost your way

If you’re not sure what has become of the life you envisioned

Help, G-d

Try it
What other option do you have?
What else could possibly move G-d more?

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit,
A broken and a contrite heart–
These, O God, You will not despise.

Psalm 51:17

Shortlink for Sharing: Desperate

Joining up with Kate Motaung and the FMF Community to write about one word for five minutes. No extreme editing; no worrying about perfect grammar, font, or punctuation. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

A Prayer for this Desert Journey

A Prayer for this Desert Journey

It has been a journey, and I continue
I press on
I ask for revelation from the Spirit of the one G-d,
the only One worthy

As I slow down and wait and hope in this desert place
Would You break in
I must have You
Only You can help me process the things I have seen
The things I have experienced
that which my heart has deeply connected with

You are a good G-d
You are a good Father, a wonderful Abba
Truly, You are good to Israel.

May I comprehend and know even more today
Your hesed, the lovingkindness
that lives within the very essence
of who You are, Abba

May I understand and know You
Awesome Creator of all
Wonderful King of the universe
One who forms and fashions the deepest depths of the oceans
The highest heights of the heavens
The most intimate parts of my being
The immeasurable pieces of my heart

Maker of the universe
Fashion in this heart
Understanding of Your heart
Understanding of Your ways,
Your laws, Your holy desires
That I might comprehend
more of who You are
In this journey of knowing
Deeper places of Your unfathomable heart