The stirrings inside
Moving, waiting, hoping
Tumultuous but calming again
What is coming
What shall come

Expectant I wait
And trust
And hope
And pray
Desperate prayers

That You still see
You still move
And You’re still answering

A light at my feet
Just enough
To take a step
But only one step forward
At a time

You know
Oh God
You know
My hope
And my expectation
I wait for You
The One who knows
Me so well
And loves me so completely



Original Photo by Gerard

Original Photo by Gerard

G-d came to me many years ago, and then again a few years ago, and then again. He didn’t come because I was good or because I was beautiful or because I was a delight to be with.

He didn’t come because he had heard of the latest book I had written or the awesome idea I had, or because of my articulate speech.

He came for none of those reasons. He didn’t come because I was good or great or worthy of his company.

It was the opposite really. I was crushed. I was broken. I didn’t know which way was up. I was confused and unsure of anything and my plans were in shambles. The ground was still shaking underneath my feet when he showed up.

When my mess was just about to take me under, he came.

My heart had lost hope. Disappointment had begun to take hold. I was just barely hanging on.

In this state, with sadness consuming my being, I looked up.

Help, G-d, please help. If there’s anything left for me, please help.

He came. He found me. He showed up.

When you wonder if he forgot your name
or if he sees you at all anymore

If you think there’s no way out of your situation.
or you’ve lost your way

If you’re not sure what has become of the life you envisioned

Help, G-d

Try it
What other option do you have?
What else could possibly move G-d more?

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit,
A broken and a contrite heart–
These, O God, You will not despise.

Psalm 51:17

Shortlink for Sharing: Desperate

Joining up with Kate Motaung and the FMF Community to write about one word for five minutes. No extreme editing; no worrying about perfect grammar, font, or punctuation. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

A Heartfelt Prayer

I am joining with katemotaung.com for Five Minute Friday. The goal is to write for five minutes about a word. No extreme editing; no worrying about perfect grammar, font, or punctuation. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

The prompt is:



Photo by dw1FLY/THEDDY MAGPAYO flickr.com

A Heartfelt Prayer

Abba, you’ve shown me so much kindness. You’ve opened your heart wide to me. You’ve shown me how much I delight your heart and because of this, you delight my heart too. Abba, I find delight in you because you are a good, good father. You’re the only good father. There’s no one like you.

Today I decide to trust you in the challenges and the losses. Today I choose to continue to believe that you will finish the work that you started. Today I lift my heart and I lift my voice to you and confess my utter dependence on you.

I thank you that your desire to bring forth good is far greater than mine. I thank you that you can do this when I have nothing to bring.

In this moment I give you my heart again, I trust you again. No matter what people may do to me, you will not leave me alone.

Shortlink for Sharing: http://wp.me/p3vZRl-kI

Asking Abba

Abba, I Belong to You 4

Writing Daily
Encountering Abba’s Heart

Asking Abba

Little girl sat on Abba’s lap. She had been thinking about so many things in the last few days and she decided she needed to ask Abba some questions.

“Abba, thank you for adopting me. I’m so happy to be yours but I wonder why you picked me. Can we go get some of my friends where I stayed? I think they wanted to be picked by you too. I miss them and they need you too!” Little girl surprised herself with her request.

Abba smiled with delight at the little girl’s thoughts and desire for her little friends to know him, “I love you, little girl. I’m so happy you came to me. You’re a wonderful daughter. I’d love to go and get some of your friends. I know them. I know their needs. I love them, little girl. Did you know that? I love them too even though they are aren’t here with us yet.”

Little girl thought about this for a minute. She was so happy Abba cared about and loved her friends too. “Okay, Abba. Will it be long?” She asked with anticipation.

“Not long, little girl. Not long at all,” Abba replied.

Little girl felt better. She had made her simple request known and trusted Abba that they would go get her friends soon.

Check out my 31 Days of Encountering Abba’s Heart

Shortlink for Sharing: http://wp.me/p3vZRl-hZ

Love Whispers

I am joining with Kate Motaung for Five Minute Friday. The goal is to write for five minutes about a word. No extreme editing; no worrying about perfect grammar, font, or punctuation. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

Today’s prompt is:


fear-600x600 - Version 2

Love Whispers


Why is it
in this desert land,
where the stillness and silence is tangible,
fear seems to shout so loud,
and I actually take a moment to listen

Why is it
in this wilderness of betrothal,
where You’ve promised to meet me,
that love whispers softly,
and I scarcely bend my ear to hear

Thank You that You see me and know me,
You know my heart after You,
and You set Your love upon me
and call me beautiful

Despite myself and all my ways
You call me Yours, Your beloved one

Could today be the day
that my ears are attune to hear
Your loud love whispering over me

Could today be the day when
I shout back at fear
and tell him where he belongs:
bowing low at Your feet
Just like me

I love You, my G-d
I am Yours and You are mine


You Remain

I am joining with Kate Motaung for Five Minute Friday. The goal is to write for five minutes about a word. No extreme editing; no worrying about perfect grammar, font, or punctuation. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

Today’s prompt is:



You Remain

This world,
so quickly fading away
day by day, hour by hour
Aching for Your redemption

What are You doing, Abba?
What are You saying?

My prayer today
Please give me eyes to see how You see
Give me ears to hear Your voice
Give me a heart to comprehend,
to understand Your ways,
to turn towards You
moment by moment by moment

Your commands lead me to life
Your precepts cause my heart to live
Your testimonies make wise this simple heart

The world fades
You remain
The nations rage
Your Word stands

As the days and seasons prophesy
As the earth shifts and shakes
Every living being longs
for You to come,
for You to make all things right

May I be found pleasing to You
Give me a heart that comprehends Your ways
Give me a hunger for Your light, Your truth
that I can consume Your Word
and understand Your ways
that all darkness within would be removed

Cleanse my heart
Purify my hands
That I may be found pleasing in Your sight
G-d of my life,
My Beloved
My Abba
My Everything


A Prayer for this Desert Journey

A Prayer for this Desert Journey

It has been a journey, and I continue
I press on
I ask for revelation from the Spirit of the one G-d,
the only One worthy

As I slow down and wait and hope in this desert place
Would You break in
I must have You
Only You can help me process the things I have seen
The things I have experienced
that which my heart has deeply connected with

You are a good G-d
You are a good Father, a wonderful Abba
Truly, You are good to Israel.

May I comprehend and know even more today
Your hesed, the lovingkindness
that lives within the very essence
of who You are, Abba

May I understand and know You
Awesome Creator of all
Wonderful King of the universe
One who forms and fashions the deepest depths of the oceans
The highest heights of the heavens
The most intimate parts of my being
The immeasurable pieces of my heart

Maker of the universe
Fashion in this heart
Understanding of Your heart
Understanding of Your ways,
Your laws, Your holy desires
That I might comprehend
more of who You are
In this journey of knowing
Deeper places of Your unfathomable heart