Gaining Ground – Adventures in Trust

Trust

Abba and little girl had been on quite the adventure that took them far from the home she had come to know. They returned but little girl didn’t quite feel at home when she arrived back with Abba. The adventure had somehow changed her. Knowing more of her adopted family’s story had marked little girl’s heart in a surprising way.

Little girl had grown up fast in the surroundings she had lived in before being adopted by Abba. She had learned much very young. In her time with Abba, she had begun to learn what it was like to be a child. She had learned that she didn’t have to keep everything together. She had learned that Abba would take care of her. She had learned that it was okay to feel and to cry and to let go. She had learned that something, rather someone, was safe in her life: Abba.

The journey of a child unlearning the very skills that had helped her survive her early years of life was challenging. Yet she knew she was safe with Abba. When she realized she was safe, her heart began to move and feel things she had nearly never known before.

When little girl felt safe, she could deal with the feelings of joy and longing and fear that she had pushed aside for many years. What a journey this had been and what a journey this would be as Abba began to expand their relationship by sharing his family’s story with her.

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The Way of the Heart

I am joining with Kate Motaung for Five Minute Friday. The goal is to write for five minutes about a word. No extreme editing; no worrying about perfect grammar, font, or punctuation. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

Today’s prompt is:
Same

The Way of the Heart

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The One whose voice is like thunder
Who causes the mountains to tremble
He is the same G-d who fashioned my being in His hands
and formed my heart with His breath

The way of G-d is the way of the heart
The way of the heart is the way of love
Your ways, O G-d, are filled with life

Abba, please tell me more about your ways,
your laws,
your statutes,
your commands

It’s easy to forget the mystery of the heart of the only good Father to draw us in. His desire for us is that we would be close to Him. The G-d of all creation, the Creator of you and me wants us near. The same One who made my heart and mind, who gave me the ability to love and feel, and to weep and stand in awe, He wants me close.

Yet He doesn’t just want me nearby. He wants me to turn toward Him and talk to Him. He wants me to tell Him about what I love and what I feel and why I’m weeping and why I’m afraid. He wants me to tell Him what moves my heart. He cares about what’s on my heart. As I tell Him all of these things I get to know Him more and I get to love Him more.

He is my Father and He loves it when I talk to Him. No one could have written a better story. No one could have created such a stunning path.

He made me. He knows me. He’s G-d and He’s perfect, yet He wants me close. He wants me near to Him. He wants to prove to me the goodness of His heart, the truth of who He is as Father.

The one and only Maker of heaven and earth is the same one who chooses to prove His love to you and me because He loves us that much.

He’s not waiting for the theologians to articulate a theology of how to be close to Him. He’s not waiting for the self-righteous ones to prove they’re worthy to be in His presence. He’s not waiting for the brilliant minds to concoct a plan to find the closest proximity to Him.

He’s not waiting for the clay to make a better way. He doesn’t need the clay. He’s the potter. He made us for His glory. Abba made us for Himself.

May we run into the heart of the Father
and begin to comprehend the incomprehensible
love of G-d
that we never deserved
and could not have earned

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Friendship with G-d

I am joining with Kate Motaung for Five Minute Friday. The goal is to write for five minutes about a word. No extreme editing; no worrying about perfect grammar, font, or punctuation. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

Today’s prompt is:
Yes

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Friendship with G-d

I say Yes to You again today Abba
I say Yes to us again today
I say Yes to this relationship, this friendship
with You and You with me

I want to talk to You like You’re sitting right beside me
I want to love you and express my heart to You
like You’re my best friend
because You are
I want to listen to You and hear the things
that are on Your heart today and tomorrow and every day after

I want to live inside of Your love, Your heart,
Your desires, Your good for my life
I want us to be close, really close
I say Yes to this relationship again today
Please help me
I really need you to help me
to give You my all,
to trust You wholeheartedly
to love You in the way that You’ve designed me to love You

Help me Abba
Help me to love you the way that You love me
I say Yes to You again today Abba
I say Yes to us again today
I say Yes to this relationship, this friendship
with You and You with me

I want to talk to You like You’re sitting right beside me
I want to love you and express my heart to You
like You’re my best friend
because You are
I want to listen to You and hear the things
that are on Your heart today and tomorrow and every day after

I want to live inside of Your love,
Your heart, Your desires, Your good
for my life
I want us to be close, really close
I say yes to this relationship again today
Please help me
I really need you to help me
to give You my all,
to trust You wholeheartedly
to love You in the way that You’ve designed me to love You

Help me Abba
Help me to love you the way that You love me

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Love of G-d

I am joining with Kate Motaung for Five Minute Friday. The goal is to write for five minutes about a word. No extreme editing; no worrying about perfect grammar, font, or punctuation. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

Today’s prompt is:
Learn

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love of G-d

What do I have to learn? From yesterday and today? What about tomorrow? What is it You have to say in all the bumps and bruises from today? There is so much to gain in the day to day. There is so much for my heart to take in, yet I often think I have no ability left to receive.

For a moment my soul is captivated by the kindness of who You are. I remember it’s possible.

I then find myself drowning in the ache of disappointment. Just then, You visit me again. Just when I thought I couldn’t handle one more thing, You said that I’d be okay. You said that You’re my Father and You’ll help me. Somehow, despite myself, I believe You. You are so big yet my finite capacity almost paralyzes me at times. You give me the strength to carry on, to take in and embody all that You long to give to me.

Just when my tent pegs feel stretched to the max, You whisper sweetly to my heart, “Just a little more, a little further, just let Me have a little more of you.”

My heart momentarily responds like Job, thinking You ask more than You deserve of me. A moment passes when I realize how preposterous my heart can be in the most critical of moments.

You whisper again, “I love You. I know all of your ways.” My heart crumbles in a puddle of tears on the floor when I hear You. I remember the deal: I give myself to You, You in turn share Your heart with me. I remind myself that this is what I desire and this is what You desire. I remind myself that this will never be easy but it will be the best script anyone could have written for my life.

I remember Your beautiful affections for Your people. I remember Your immeasurable kindnesses towards me. I remember Your pleasure in my life. I am undone. I forget myself and free fall into You. My heart cries out in gratefulness from the deepest places within my being. Thank You Abba.

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Love Whispers

I am joining with Kate Motaung for Five Minute Friday. The goal is to write for five minutes about a word. No extreme editing; no worrying about perfect grammar, font, or punctuation. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

Today’s prompt is:

Fear

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Love Whispers

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Why is it
in this desert land,
where the stillness and silence is tangible,
fear seems to shout so loud,
and I actually take a moment to listen

Why is it
in this wilderness of betrothal,
where You’ve promised to meet me,
that love whispers softly,
and I scarcely bend my ear to hear

Thank You that You see me and know me,
You know my heart after You,
and You set Your love upon me
and call me beautiful

Despite myself and all my ways
You call me Yours, Your beloved one

Could today be the day
that my ears are attune to hear
Your loud love whispering over me

Could today be the day when
I shout back at fear
and tell him where he belongs:
bowing low at Your feet
Just like me

I love You, my G-d
I am Yours and You are mine

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You Remain

I am joining with Kate Motaung for Five Minute Friday. The goal is to write for five minutes about a word. No extreme editing; no worrying about perfect grammar, font, or punctuation. Unscripted. Unedited. Real.

Today’s prompt is:

World

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You Remain

This world,
so quickly fading away
day by day, hour by hour
Aching for Your redemption

What are You doing, Abba?
What are You saying?

My prayer today
Please give me eyes to see how You see
Give me ears to hear Your voice
Give me a heart to comprehend,
to understand Your ways,
to turn towards You
moment by moment by moment

Your commands lead me to life
Your precepts cause my heart to live
Your testimonies make wise this simple heart

The world fades
You remain
The nations rage
Your Word stands

As the days and seasons prophesy
As the earth shifts and shakes
Every living being longs
for You to come,
for You to make all things right

May I be found pleasing to You
Give me a heart that comprehends Your ways
Give me a hunger for Your light, Your truth
that I can consume Your Word
and understand Your ways
that all darkness within would be removed

Cleanse my heart
Purify my hands
That I may be found pleasing in Your sight
G-d of my life,
My Beloved
My Abba
My Everything

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A Prayer for this Desert Journey

A Prayer for this Desert Journey
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It has been a journey, and I continue
I press on
I ask for revelation from the Spirit of the one G-d,
the only One worthy

As I slow down and wait and hope in this desert place
Would You break in
I must have You
Only You can help me process the things I have seen
The things I have experienced
that which my heart has deeply connected with

You are a good G-d
You are a good Father, a wonderful Abba
Truly, You are good to Israel.

May I comprehend and know even more today
Your hesed, the lovingkindness
that lives within the very essence
of who You are, Abba

May I understand and know You
Awesome Creator of all
Wonderful King of the universe
One who forms and fashions the deepest depths of the oceans
The highest heights of the heavens
The most intimate parts of my being
The immeasurable pieces of my heart

Maker of the universe
Fashion in this heart
Understanding of Your heart
Understanding of Your ways,
Your laws, Your holy desires
That I might comprehend
more of who You are
In this journey of knowing
Deeper places of Your unfathomable heart

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